On Monday Petra Wise "The Wise (*Young*) Mommy" wrote about ovulation. I enjoyed every word.
It was her first ovulation after stopping birth control. The account of how she tried (unsuccessfully) to get her husband to conceive their next child(ren) almost inspired me to respond, "I would've given in right away."
But I didn't write that, and I'm glad. It was the way my horny hormones wanted to respond. The fact is that the worst sex I've ever had was when my wife wanted to conceive. Thankfully, it was only once.1
Because for a guy, the meaning of sex changes when conception is the goal. It suddenly stops being fun. One day you're holding back from getting the new sheets spotted, the next you're trying to perform. One day you're sneaking it in and pulling back just before it's too late, the next you're almost forcing it to happen.
Making love is fun; making babies is not.
Ironically, once my wife found out that she was pregnant, sex was fun again. Why? "Because," I told myself, "she can't get pregnant, again."
So I'm sorry Petra. You're beautiful even with the tattoos. But I'm not available right now.
1 Yes, my wife got pregnant on the first try. She said later that if she knew how easy it was, she would've waited another year. But nearly everyone else around her was having so much trouble getting pregnant, she was worried it would be difficult. Not me. I figured I'd be buying baby furniture and losing that second income real soon.
It was her first ovulation after stopping birth control. The account of how she tried (unsuccessfully) to get her husband to conceive their next child(ren) almost inspired me to respond, "I would've given in right away."
But I didn't write that, and I'm glad. It was the way my horny hormones wanted to respond. The fact is that the worst sex I've ever had was when my wife wanted to conceive. Thankfully, it was only once.1
Because for a guy, the meaning of sex changes when conception is the goal. It suddenly stops being fun. One day you're holding back from getting the new sheets spotted, the next you're trying to perform. One day you're sneaking it in and pulling back just before it's too late, the next you're almost forcing it to happen.
Making love is fun; making babies is not.
Ironically, once my wife found out that she was pregnant, sex was fun again. Why? "Because," I told myself, "she can't get pregnant, again."
So I'm sorry Petra. You're beautiful even with the tattoos. But I'm not available right now.
1 Yes, my wife got pregnant on the first try. She said later that if she knew how easy it was, she would've waited another year. But nearly everyone else around her was having so much trouble getting pregnant, she was worried it would be difficult. Not me. I figured I'd be buying baby furniture and losing that second income real soon.
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3 comments:
Okay, you just blew my mind. I have no idea why I thought you were a chick.
So I'm reading the post and thinking, hmm that would have been awkward for a chick to leave a comment about being horny on another chick's blog. Well, she said she didn't do it.
Uh, she got her *wife* pregnant. WHAT?! Maybe they live in California, I'm open minded.
Then I read the footnote, was confused. Read the about paragraph in your sidebar.
Ran back to my pad to read the last two comments from you and imagine a dude was saying it, instead of a chick.
And wondered why I thought you were a chick (scratches head).
So I guess you're a guy, eh?
Yes, I'm a guy. Or at least I was when I last checked. :)
I think you might have me confused with Karen, who also comments on your blog.
I'll write a post about this, soon. Maybe tonight.
In the mean time, please accept my apology for confusing you.
I *thought* Karen was the author of Squarepeg. Are you a multiple personality?
Does she post here too? Now I'm intrigued!
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